FOBO: The Fear of Burning Out

At The Edges No. 8

Fear of burning out, in my experience, has done more damage to me than burning out, and i've been through both.

I used to hold back on hobby projects because I thought it would ruin the fun. Turns out focusing in, trying to do my best, and putting effort into learning and deliberate practice, make the hobbies richer and more enjoyable.

Burnout isn’t caused by overextertion. It’s caused by lack of meaning, boredom, or a lack of control. Building skills helps you push through those. More effort equals less burnout.

At the start of the year, one of the goals I set for myself was to put more effort into writing, to see how that felt. While I am still early in this journey, I am already seeing the benefits. The biggest one? Writing feels less draining. The cost-per-article is lower now — I can move from idea to article faster and with more confidence.

My dad gave me a guitar for my 13th birthday. I didn’t ask for one, never wanted one, but he knew I would love it. At first, it wasn’t fun. My ring finger on my fretting hand is a centimeter off, so instead of hearing a satisfying crunching power chord I hear a dissapointing thunk. I play the same simple songs over and over and over. How many times do I have to slog through Bush’s Glycerine I can play it all the way through?

Then, it clicks. I gain fluency. I can just play. Chords and melodies come natrually. I can nail the opening riff of Black Dog and Master of Puppets without thinking. I can jam and groove with friends. It’s amazing. Dad was right.

All it took was three years of consistent effort.

Passion is built, not discovered

Effort and deliberate practice increases your enjoyment and connection with an activity. As Magness and Stulberg point out in their book The Passion Paradox, being connected and intentional doesn’t drain you, it fuels you.

I don’t know why it took me so long to realize this. Besides guitarm I’ve put effort into other hobbies: I’ve run a half marathon. I’ve defeated Malenia. I enjoyed them, despite it being hard. Maybe it’s because after a stressful day, it’s harder to pick these hobbies up. We do only have so much energy in a day, after all.

Life is a marathon, not a sprint. Hell, as I approach my 39th birthday, some days are a marathon. We have to leave something in the tank so we can bring the best of ourselves to what matters. It’s an investment, and it’s worth it.

That said, as soon as I finish this draft manuscript of System is as System DoesI’m taking a break and not looking at the damn thing for a week.